"WE CHEAT TOURISTS, DRUNKS,
AND ATTORNEYS"
BURNEY, BURNEY, WIGGINS, SPLOOG, BIGGUN, LITTLE and MORE
A LAW CORPORATION Of Counsel Ben Dover
1412 Kuhio Highway Kapaa, Hi 96746
Phone (808) 822-9494 Fax (808) 823-0069

April 3, 1992

Mr. Kevin C. McDonough
3852 Geary Blvd.
San Franciso, CA 94118-3211


Re: "We Cheat Tourists and Drunks"

Dear Kevin,

I have been retained by BUBBA'S to reply to your letter of April 1, 1992.

We are here on a distant island and are somewhat out of touch with the CITY. If you would do me the courtesy of telling me if you are licensed to practice before the federal bench; also, if you would supply the following information: age; DOB; SS#; law degree from what school; date of degree; grade point average; home address; bank account numbers and balances; tax returns for last 3 years; credit card numbers; list of family or friends who are judges, elected officals, wealthy tycoons or Mafia Dons; and names of federal judges you have in your pocket. This information would perhaps let us communicate more directly in the hopes of avoiding costly legal expenses for my client as well as yours.

In any event, we have disregarded your letter for the following reasons:

PURELY COINCIDENTAL

NO CONFUSION, DECEPTION OR FRAUD INTENDED

DIFFERENT AREA

NO DAMAGES OR LOSSES

BIG PENALTIES FOR FRIVOLOUS LITIGATION !

Your speedy reply to these questions will be greatly appreciated.

Up yours,

BEN DOVER

 


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